Progress

29 March, 2010 3:55 PM EST

Reporting to you from Princeton, NJ, 55 degrees, visibility 10 mi., winds NE at 5 to 10 mph. While the humidity has dampered my observations it has not dampered my spirit of observation. Indeed, I have erected an observation deck operating out a non visible spot in Firestone with wide views overlooking Nassau Street. This deck composes of: standing binoculars, necessary writing utensils, graphs of trends and patterns, and tracking devices that constantly stream into my phone which has an application for such necessary data. This application of course was devised by me. I plan to note these trends accordingly.

I have also launched a new offensive: Operation Vigilant. I have noticed that Public Safety has not taken due measures to protect the campus from potentially harmful influences. I am proud to say that I have made necessary trackings of students I deem suspicious. I have noticed, for example, a young girl who goes by "Yuna" (code name: Y Effect) has been making rounds to a body of water consistently around 4:30 PM EST every day. Y Effect proceeds to command her forces composed of taller individuals onto this body of water and makes progress in manipulating these persons. I believe that these peoples need my assistance in freeing them from their harmful influences. A full report will be made to Public Safety in the ensuing days when I have collected enough data.

I will discuss the highs and lows of the past days.

Highs: Construction and maintenance of Observation Deck, launching Operation Vigilant, steady stream of updates from phone application. Procured successful saliva sample from half eaten cookie in Cottage--have placed in bag for further analysis. However, needed necessary energy to continue investigations, and so consumed data. Have collected saliva samples out of my mouth. Making progress.

Lows: Y Effect is elusive. She dances a dance with me, and I refuse to let her slip away. Her sassiness is not unnoticed. Temporary dislocation of Observation Deck in Firestone--however, recovered from circulation desk. Strengthened Observation Deck by drilling it into ground.

Progress is being made. With progress, conquest is made.

Signing out,

Creepy Caroline

Observations

Today I watched some people from my dorm room window. I saw many interesting people, and I decided to further investigate with my 4345 XX Binoculars that I use for special occasions. I knew that it was such an occasion when I saw a short limbed, brunette girl that seems to go by the name "Mumma" as well as her cohort, another girl named "Alyson" and her other companions. I took notes accordingly.

High: Observance outside my dorm room, McGraw center (viewings esp. good at 2 AM), Ivy window last night (again late night, above the bench between the stairs), the 1901 bathroom, Firestone trustee reading room (although sightings were difficult between the frosted names), McCosh center (was incorrectly diagnosed with wandering eyes. I took notes accordingly).

Low: Incorrect diagnosis at McCosh. No response from my professor when I complimented his tie after emailing him about it. Again no response when I tried again on Good Crush, being sure to explicitly detail every article of clothing and of course, his name. Insufficient viewing from boathouse window from the hours 4:00 A.m. to 6 A.M. E.S.T. Again, took notes accordingly.

Exciting news flash for you all: I am currently developing a journal with my collections of photos, hair samples, saliva samples, and photos (taken at inopportune times). I think I have a potential target in Argentina but currently methodizing strategy for maximum information. I will be in touch when this book becomes available to the narrow public.

Signing out,

Creepy Caroline

Apparently I'm supposed to be Killjoy, but Buzzkill already has "kill" in her name and I want to be different. Is that soooo wrong?? Why is everyone getting mad at me for going through an identity crisis??

High: It stopped being rainy.
Low: It's still cold because it's windy.
Something I've accomplished: Getting invited to this effing blog. I sat here and whined until mopey finally added me. That slut. I was soo kranky, damn her.

I emailed with Buzzkill a lot today, which was nice until I realized she's abroad. If she were here we'd be pong partners tonight, but she's not and I'm kranky.

Haiku:
Don't know what to say
A haiku is hard for me
I have to give up

Youuuu krank that soulja boy,
Krankzzzz

font

shit-mopey uses arial.
opps. I guess it's not that big of deal. Well maybe it is. sorry.
-awkward

haiku

Haiku:
the paper is done (5 syllables)
my anger has now subdued (7 syllables)
I'm awkward again (5 syllables)

I can't remember the format of our posts so i just did a haiku.
I'm sure you can tell it's a haiku because I labeled my post haiku and wrote haiku above the actual haiku. I also labeled the syllable count. I don't remember if we use times or arial as our font so I'm going to go with times.

-Awkward

first post

what up all you people in foreign lands? Let me give you a little update of what's been going on outside the club 331 bubble, aka my life. this promises to be boring.

first of all, its been raining. dang, what a let down after those few glorious days of spring. but you know what they say...march storms bring april warms. ok no one says that. i went to the mens lax game on saturday and got the opportunity to participate in the three legged race at half time with casey, zach, and nick. zach and i lost...but probably for the best because it was supposedly a couples competition (we found this out when they announced it) and the prize was a dinner and stay for two at some hotel nearby.

in other news, i had a great breakfast this morning. scrambled eggs with cheese, bacon, french toast. in fact it was so good that i'm not even hungry for lunch, which is why I'm writing this post, to waste time.

let me do some highs and lows, or as i prefer to call them roses and thorns, as well as an addition, a "bud"

Rose: i've gotten a lot of sleep and i feel good.

thorn: i don't know man, life is good. maybe that it is now snowing in big sky where i was just skiing, wish i would have been there for some pow.

bud: this morning i talked to a friend i met in morocco last summer who has come to NYC for a year for an internship. hoping I'll get to see him soon.

something i've accomplished: submitted my photos to the forbes photo competition. these are the three i submitted: http://picasaweb.google.com/113652984839757529326/PhotoCompetition?authkey=Gv1sRgCJL-_v7_rtzpkAE#

haiku

rain rain go away

i like bacon, eggs, and toast

mike, haikus are lame

phish lyric of the day: "I'm moving through this life and thinking about the next/I hope that when I get there, I'll be better dressed."

till next time,

john

views from the train

Awkward turns Angry

We actually do have an update today: one of our contributors, the artist formerly known as Awkward, has become Angry. This is not entirely surprising, given the nature of Princeton academia, but it's unfortunately shown itself to be a turn for the worse. Angry is kind of an uncomfortable study partner these days, because even her laughter is just maniacal, more than anything else. I know she might read this post at some point, which makes me feel a little down, because I'm afraid that she might go from Angry to downright Aggressive. Either way, I need a way to get the feelings out, and this blog is the perfect way for me to express my predictably sad state of mind.

High: I can't really think of anything right now. I've been philosophizing about feelings. What is anger, really? How is it that some among us exhibit this emotion more than others? And how is it that awkwardness was so suddenly shed in favor of this decidedly more negative emotion?

Low: Everything.

Something we've accomplished: Tactless strained her back muscles, due to "carrying the team." In addition to this accomplishment of sorts, Angry has zero pages on her paper due tomorrow, and it makes her angry. OH, actual accomplishment: we have a new contributor on her way, Killjoy/Kranky Kelsey. Sassy Sakuma may also join us.

Haiku:

It's a rainy day...
Is that the source of anger?
It makes me feel sad.

isn't princeton exciting.

Out for now,
Mopey

So bitch, pump my keg.

Again, sorry for the delay in posting...

Our fridge still has a couple of beers-- I'm a little mopey about it. Maybe five? Actually probably four.

High: Jealous' cereal looks soooooooooooooooooooo milky/crunchy.

Low: 'cause he's a LAX bro, and I'm a LAXtitute (sorry, Alyson, we left before you could HU)

Something we've accomplished: sadly, nothing...? i went to the bathroom once or twice.

A haiku:

the LAXers are drunk
joelle wants to stare at them
no stoph for awkward

:-(

Out for now,
Mopey

We've done so much!

Sorry it's been so long since our last post.

High: iTunes visualizer - Alyson giggles too much

Low: Katie hasn't showered today - she's trying to be like Mike - ew - seriously

Something we've accomplished: we stocked a fridge full of beer (b/c Kelley's 21!!!). We talked about what races/ethnicities we've hooked up with. I have only hooked up with one person ever - a handsome Jew.



Haiku:
Fridge stocked with beer now
Katie got some budweiser
Next time choose bud light

isn't princeton exciting.

I love my friends because I look good in comparison,
Tactless

PICTURE- i'm so uncomfortable

Hi. missing womp womp. oops. is that mean? I don't know. oops-this is awkward. oh shoot different font from Katie's post. so awkward. i have to go-bye.

oh forgot...miss you. bye for real. haha

Inaugural Post

Greetings to all you travelers waiting with baited breath for news from us in Princeton,

Skype and telephone, email and facebook chat simply weren't enough.

As we were sitting around here, in Princeton (more specifically, in no-fun-331), we realized that it would be a damn shame if we didn't have a blog just because we didn't happen to go abroad. Inspired by a friend, we've decided that the layout of our posts will be as follows:

"High": this is the part of the post in which we pretend we are high.

"Low": this is the part of the post in which we are drunk (we don't need to pretend about this one--also, alcohol is a depressant...Get it? Low. Princeton kids are so smart.)

Something we have accomplished: this part of the post will be short.

A haiku: there is no cooler type of poem, also they will mostly be about Princeton lyfe.

High: asfkasjfasgasfjasklfjasjgha;slkfjasdfj

Low: haahaaa aa a may is stuckshfask in GREECGGE

Something we have accomplished: Kelley bought her first six-pack of Stella!!

A haiku:

On campus "working."
Seven days, zero pages--
will black out tonight.

isn't princeton exciting.

Out for now,

Mopey Mumma
Jealous Joelle
Awkward Alyson
Weepy Nguyen
Womp-womp Wetenhall
Tactless Taylor